Netflix airs
this show ‘Indian Matchmaking” which is about a woman who pairs up India
singletons who have hired her services to find true love in India and US.
“Let me tell
you, you need to adjust… You can never get all 100 per cent….. You have to
compromise”
For a person who
has been searching for prospects these are few lines I have been hearing consistently.
Irony to hear the same being said in a reality program aired in Netflix.
When the first
season of Indian Matchmaking was released, Sima Taparia the proud matchmaker
from Mumbai had unrealistic goals for single women in their late 30’s. The show
opens with Sima stating “In India, marriage is a big fat industry. It’s between
two families” She reminded me of the typical Indian aunties who decide
everything for you as you have crossed the marriageable age or to be precise you
are old that you should not have any expectation.
She has a
journal where she writes everything. Oh, and the best she has an astrologer who
predicts if the couple’s sex life will be a hit or a miss. And her punch
dialogue similar to Bollywood movies is “You need to adjust and be happy with
what you are getting”. Height, earnings, looks, charisma, qualification, compatibility
etc are not to be looked into since marriage is the end result.
At one point in
the series, Sima aunty says, “if the girl is pretty, she has an upper hand” and
that did hit me hard. Who decides what is pretty? Yes, most men go for women
who are pretty and dame in distress. She also says, “You should marry the
person first and then think about love” Shouldn’t it be the other way round,
Sima Aunty?
Now this made me
wonder if she had the same standards for the men. Well, hell no! When in one of
the episodes the guy does no turn up since he forgot about it, Sima aunty
informs the girl, since he is a boy its ok as he would have had a difficult day
at work. Yup we still are living in stone age where women are slaves. She also
states that Priyanka Chopra and Nick Jonas are not a perfect couple and why
would that be; - because Priyanka is older than Nick. Well should it not be the
case with most of the male actors who are cradle snatchers. Oh yes, they are
boys, it fine in the society.
I have been
looking for a perfect match for the past few years. I have spoken to couple of
men and trust me how much ever mimes are being published on the show, that’s
the sad reality. I remember one guy who used to leave jobs and go back to his
hometown since he could not be independent. He was amazed that am doing all
housework on my own. When watching the show, I could relate so much whenever a
guy / mother asked if I could do household chores, cook since the son loved
eating. Why can’t a man cook and do the household chores? I remember once I
asked a guy on what his hobbies were and how does he spend his weekend. His
response was he sits at home and has not stepped out much since parents took
care of the house. He was shocked that my weekends were so busy, and he felt I
was fabricating it that he stopped messaging me without a reason. Maybe
accepting an independent, outspoken and confident woman was difficult for him.
And accepting a man who is naïve and lacks confident is definitely deal breaker
for me. Shital, Aparna, Nadia all the women in the show are super confident and
why would they settle for less when they are giving their 100 percent?
The show and
Sima aunty have left me with a lot of questions. Yes, the show is regressive
but unfortunately that is how our society is. Men cant handle successful women.
Men want a trophy wife and families want someone who can manage the household
and the mollycoddled grown son. I wish that would change
Loved the read as always !! Unfortunately it's the sad reality !!
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