Glutton Groom - (Saapadu Raman)

 

Been sometime since I wrote about my wonderful prospective groom hunt. The optimist in me does not give up, despite several rejection and hilarious encounters which I have faced during my pursuit of a life partner. My brother and dad shared few details of protective suitors along with their photo and write-up. Guess my profession helps me in assessing a person and once conversation starts, I smile to myself thinking ‘Bulls Eye’.

So, coming to this alliance, let me start with naming the person. As his name is Vijay Jayaraman, I would name him as VJ, which will make it easy for us to follow in the story. VJ matched my first few criteria – taller than me (Yup he was close to 6 Feet), earning a good salary as per his qualification and work experience. Two ticks in the box. I looked at his photos and it put me off, (I don’t go by looks) since he reminded me of ‘Reggie Mantle’ from the Archies comics. When I meant Reggie, he looked to be a narcissist and arrogant. I shared my concerns with my brother, and he felt I should give it a try and not go by my intuition at least this time. As the saying goes beggars can’t be choosers, I decided I will connect with this person and keep aside my assessment and look at it unbiasedly.

So VJ a techie geek dropped a message checking, if we could connect over the weekend and if I have a specific time in mind. I confirmed on the time and he was good with it and informed he would give me a call. However, over the weekend I fell sick and I was in the mindset to push the call to a later date since I was getting drowsy due to antibiotics. VJ was punctual and he called me exactly on time. That really impressed me, since I like people who are stickler to time. I could not talk much cos of my cold and informed him, I might be not able to talk much since am under the weather and there is a possibility of me coughing in between. Neither did he empathize nor acknowledge what I said. Now that got me confused, cos I wasn’t sure if he heard me right. But he did not give me time to think, since he got into  introducing himself.  He started off with what his job is and how he has managed to outshine in his career.  Guess everyone is getting confused over here why the conversation is on goals and career. Well I was  not interviewing him for a job opening. I did not stop VJ, since I felt he wanted to talk about how his career looks like. He mentioned how he has traveled to various countries on work and is keen at exploring abroad opportunities. VJ had come over to India before the lockdown and finally he started working from Chennai. He was keen on settling in an ‘English Speaking nation’. Yup, you read it right, those were the exact words used by him to iterate that he wanted to settle down in a country where English is the national Language. Anyways the conversation went on and on of how he is ambitious and how he keeps upgrading his skills to be at the top of things. (Though he was bragging, it sounded sensible).

Finally, he was done with the conversation or that is what I presumed. The next round started, which is the Q&A session. He wanted to understand why I wasn’t married and still single. I informed him that I had not met the right person and there are a lot of jokers who thought no end of themselves. (Stressed that I can’t withstand egoistic men) I wanted to understand why he was not married till date. I was sure, for his arrogance and self-centered behavior, he would never have had a steady relationship and if I am mistaken god bless that girl.  The reason he gave for him not being married was the best I have heard so far. He started grumbling and whining he was not married cos of his father. This got me confused and before I could probe him any further, he informed why he blamed his dad. He has a younger sister and his father wanted her to get married before he looks for his son. He was annoyed for the delay since his sister was very picky (as per him) and finally he had to push her to get married which was around 2 years back.

He was so bitter of the entire incident and I was imagining the entire scene in my head and was amazed he was complaining about his family and finding fault with them in the first call. VJ then stressed on him being a ‘simple man’ and expects his wife to cook. (Now don’t ask me what the connection between him  being simple and needing a wife who cooks). Well, I assure he was not planning to open a restaurant and neither offering his wife a job of a Sous-chef. The simple man just wanted someone to cook for him and was against having a cook. Honestly the iteration that he gave on cooking did not stress me out, since  each person has their own expectation. But what pissed me off was, he kept on stressing on cooking thrice on the call, till I responded I know cooking.

His next question was on if I am career oriented. I informed him my job has kept me going and has given me steady income, so if he is expecting me to sit at home, then we can conclude the call right now. He responded that since he would go onsite, he would expect wife to tag along. I was losing my cool, but I responded after getting composed. I asked him, if he is planning to go for a two-week project, does it make sense the other person leaving everything and running behind him. I informed, I have not thought about it and if we come to that situation, then we can ponder about it. VJ realized I had got annoyed with the question and there was an undertone of sarcasm in my voice.

To deviate the topic, he next asked what my hobbies are. Since I wanted to just conclude the call, responded immediately stating reading and travelling is what I enjoy the most. And a very spontaneous question came from his end, asking what about cooking? He wanted to know why wasn’t cooking a hobby. Finally, I could not take it any longer. I scoffed with full sarcasm and told VJ that his entire life was revolving around cooking and since he has been iterating on it, he needs to learn cooking rather than expecting the other partner to know cooking. His response to my statement was that he was a simple man like he mentioned previously (missed asking him what was his understanding of simple man) with a slim body structure. I decided to not shut my mouth any further and asked him if his photo was a recent one, since he did not look slim and neither was, I slim.  I remarked that his expectation was of a model, which I wasn’t so probably you would need to revisit my profile. VJ informed, he had seen my picture and I seem to be fine. He wanted me to share a recent picture which would help him assess me better. I concluded the call and did not want to take it any forward.

VJ messaged on WhatsApp asking for my recent photos and a write up. I had enough of him and informed he can check all those details in the matrimonial site and am not comfortable sharing it with him over WhatsApp. After going through my profile, he texted me that I was very pretty, and I thanked him for the compliment (Within hearts least bit interested to have another conversation with this guy). The response to that was hilarious and got me laughing. He wanted both set of parents to meet up and finalize. I informed him that it was a one-way conversation and before I take a life changing decision in my life, I need to discuss and meet in person. His immediate response for that was he agreed to what I am saying, and he also felt the same way. Now, this got me confused and I started reading the chat conversation once again to understand, if I had misread the entire chat since he sounded desperate to get married and have someone who will cook for him and tag along with him. I finally concluded the chat and prayed on never having a future encounter or conversation with VJ aka Reggie Mantle of real life.

It is so disappointing to see people being so arrogant and not valuing others. It surprised me that  educated people and people who have worked and travelled the world are still narrowminded when they are looking at a partner for themselves. So finally, I said goodbye to another suitor.